The meaning of an image

This picture of Santa Gemma is together with the one in which she has her hands folded looking slightly up probably the most well-known image of her. And one must know she was not fond of having these pictures taken at the time. I think nor she, the photographer or anyone for that matter at around the turn of the 19th century into the 20th could have realized that it would appear in books, on websites, on prayercards, on countless walls etc. etc. It is an images which has changed lives including mine.

This image of Gemma (forgive me for not typing the Santa epithet. To me she's Gemma) was the very first image i saw of her after i encountered her name for the first time and became curious. Now i carry it in my wallet, it sits nicely framed next to my bed, i have it next to me when praying the Rosary and it even is my "desktop" on my Blackberry. Believe it or not, when i saw this image for the very first time somewhere late April or the beginning of May this year i knew everything would change. Often i can just sit and look at this image and just ponder about her life and the changes in my own. "Santa Gema, mi camino a Jesús, por favor, ruega por nosotros!" is how i often end my emails. For those who have no knowledge of Spanish it says: Saint Gemma, my road to Jesus, please, pray for us. And that is what she has helped accomplish. Because of her i've started a journey into catholizism. In the books about her we can read she has more than once pleaded for sinners and obtained their conversion. And often without these sinners realizing how this came into being in at the moment. So also in my case.

When i look at this picture of her i often think what she must have been thinking at the moment it was taken. And like an invisible onlooker imagine scenes like her in prayer and ecstasy, sitting in the church (an image i always have when attending Mass), doing housework, Gemma during confession. This may all sound silly for readers. Yet through these considerations i reflect on myself. Reflecting to examine my own relation to God. Where i can and must do better, the way ahead of me, but also the wonder and realization i've taken already a tiny part of the road.

Earlier i mentioned she wasn't fond of having these pictures taken but was told to do so. How often are we asked to do something we don't really want? What if God makes such a request to us? In her humility Gemma obeyed and had the pictures taken. And so must we when God asks. Because as with this picture of Gemma and the changes it has brought to many for the good when we listen to God and follow we may also spread a richness to others beyond the scope of our comprehension.

There is one wish i have. To one day see this beautiful face for real so i will be able to thank her. That is if God grants me permission to enter Heaven when the time comes. In the meantime this picture i will keep with me wherever i go until the day of my own passing arrives.